Why you don't need to be a "cookie cutter Christian" to be a Christian

First of all I feel like I need to apologise to you all for my lack of posts recently. I got fake nails for my wedding and it's taken 2 weeks to find a way of typing with them on. It was a lovely day and my husband and I were proud to be able to stand in front of God just as we are.

I know that a lot of people can be intimidated by the thought of going to church because of the assumed judgement they will receive by the people who are there... trust me, I've been on the receiving end of that judgement.

9 years ago my dad was dying and I popped into a church on my way to the hospital to light a candle and say a prayer for him. The church in question now has a lovely vicar and as a result this wouldn't have happened today but at the time an oldish lady tapped me on the shoulder as I prayed. When I opened my eyes I saw her look horrified by my presence and said "Please can you leave? we don't like your sort here". I was shocked that someone could be so narrow minded and just said "Is that what Jesus would have done?" then left.

I know the Goth aesthetic can often be intimidating to some people but to interrupt someone who was visibly praying? That is just sheer ignorance and being rude.

picture courtesy of www.christiangoth.com

I often think of how shocked Jesus would be if he walked the earth today and saw the prejudice amongst some Christians today. It is not our place to judge people, it is our job to love people, just as God loves us.

I use the term cookie cutter christian because people often have this image in their head as to what a christian should look like- almost as if God uses a cookie cutter to make his followers exactly the same... and often churches will look for people who suit their image or will try to mould someone into their image as if they are trying to squash a piece of cookie mixture into the cookie cutter to get the desired shape.

The truth is, our differences are what makes us special. In 1 Peter 3:4 it says:

" Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight."

God does not look at someone's outer appearance but rather what is inside a person. Just look at the example of Jesus. He was often seen with the lowest of the low in society: the outcasts, the tax collectors, prostitutes, fishermen... not people who had a great education or who had a good social standing at the time. He could see inside their hearts and knew that they were good people. The disciples were sometimes shocked by the people who Jesus would teach. In a society where women were classed as second class citizens, Jesus would teach them. In a society where Gentiles (non Jews) were seen as the enemy, Jesus would heal them and teach them. When his disciples started preaching in the book of Acts they were given the gift of speaking in foreign tongues on Pentecost so that they could preach the good news to everyone.

At church a few weeks ago I heard potentially the best sermon of my life. It was based on the story of Blind Bartimaeus found at Mark 10:

"46 Then they came to Jericho. As Jesus and his disciples, together with a large crowd, were leaving the city, a blind man, Bartimaeus (which means “son of Timaeus”), was sitting by the roadside begging. 47 When he heard that it was Jesus of Nazareth, he began to shout, “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!”

48 Many rebuked him and told him to be quiet, but he shouted all the more, “Son of David, have mercy on me!”

49 Jesus stopped and said, “Call him.”

So they called to the blind man, “Cheer up! On your feet! He’s calling you.” 50 Throwing his cloak aside, he jumped to his feet and came to Jesus.

51 “What do you want me to do for you?” Jesus asked him.

The blind man said, “Rabbi, I want to see.”

52 “Go,” said Jesus, “your faith has healed you.” Immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus along the road."

Jesus accepted Bartimaeus and helped him when others would have just passed him by. Since he was disabled he would have been excluded a lot instead of helped. The vicar mentioned in her sermon that "Christ has made a new order open to all who are willing to accept his love regardless of age, race, ability, gender, sexuality or class".

She also likened some christians to the disciples who merely pushed him to one side. She said "Perhaps, like those disciples we too can fail to see this new realm that God seeks to bring into existence. We lack the vision to engage in world transforming mission, perhaps we would be happy to simply go back to the way things were amongst people we know and are comfortable with".

That statement was so profound, it blew my mind. So many congregations shun people for being different. There are still churches out there who run "conversion therapy" for the LGBTQ+ community instead of welcoming them as they are.

Some churches preach that you can't have found jesus if you still dress like a goth and there is even a website called "God hates Goths" where it states that it is safer to leave your child in a playground with a paedophile, than leave your child with a goth". These are the same people who have a website called "God hates f*gs". It is abominable to think that in this time and place, some people are still trying to preach hate, not love.

Jesus loves everyone! It doesn't matter where you come from, what gender you identify with, what clothes you wear, who you have fallen in love with- Jesus is practically standing with open arms waiting for people to accept this gift. It is NOT a conditional gift with conditions attached, you just need to accept that gift.

There are quite a lot of websites out there and charities helping christians who are part of the LGBTQ+ community and I often keep them in my prayers.

The church is often likened to a human body with many parts that make up the full body. We all have different gifts and we are all individuals. A body wouldn't work if the entire congregation was an elbow joint, or a knee. Even if you think you would be the "toe" in the full body, you still have a purpose. Without toes a body cannot fully balance.

If you have ever been judged for being different I would urge you to get online and join a group so that you know there is support there. Some churches have a long way to go but through the work done by organizations and charities there can be a fully inclusive church for everyone. You don't need to be a cookie cutter christian in order to be a Christian, you need to just be you and God will accept you for who you are.

If you would like more information about the charities and organizations, I would suggest that you look for the following:

• Diverse church- online christian community of LGBTQ+ people of all ages

• LGBTI Mission- working towards acceptance and affirmation of LGBTI people within the church of england

• Kent Inclusive Christians- Runs socials etc for LGBT community

• Mosaic- Movement that campaigns for and models theological breadth, comprehensiveness, and inclusion in the Anglican church

• Christiangoth.com- online community that welcomes all who enjoy the goth aesthetic

• The Metal for Jesus facebook group

• Divine Aggresion radio- Christian Rock Radio Show